Hello and welcome.

If you're reading this at a moment when things feel tender—when part of you wants a fresh start and another part is just tired—this post is especially for you.

It's the beginning of a new year. The holidays are over. Spring is still a long way off. The world feels uncertain, maybe heavy.

And for many of us, there's this familiar tension inside.

Part of us wants a fresh start. A new chapter. More clarity. More light.

And another part of us is just tired. Still carrying what last year held. Not ready to leap forward yet.

If that's you, I want you to know: nothing has gone wrong.

This isn't about fixing yourself. It's not about pushing into a better version of you. It's about making room—space to feel your tender parts.

A Poem to Begin

I want to offer you an excerpt of the poem that has kept me company in moments like this, when light and shadow are both very present. You're welcome to just let it land however it lands.

“Wanting to live and wanting to die.
Wanting to break free and wanting to hide.
Wanting to connect and wanting to be alone.
Wanting to want and wanting to be free from want.
Child.
You hold all of these things in your vast and beautiful heart. Never turn away from any part, my love. Yet never let any part be your master.
Be free and wild like the trees in the forest. Reach out for the light, yes. But love your shadows too."
The Shadows and the Light by Jeff Foster

Both Parts Belong

From an Internal Family Systems (IFS) perspective, what this poem names so beautifully is something very simple and very radical:

Both parts belong.

The part that wants light and the part that's still in the shadows. The part that wants to begin again—and the part that's exhausted and unsure.

IFS reminds us that our inner world is made up of parts, and every part has a reason for being here. None of them are wrong. And none of them need to be in charge all of the time.

That line from the poem—"Never turn away from any part, my love. Yet never let any part be your master."—that's self-leadership.

Self isn't a part that argues better or tries harder.

Self is the spacious, compassionate awareness that can be with all of it.

Effortless Mindfulness: Noticing What's Already Here

This is where effortless mindfulness comes in.

Rather than striving to get somewhere else, we're gently noticing the awareness that's already here. The awareness that can notice wanting and not wanting. Hope and heaviness. Light and shadow.

That awareness—what IFS calls Self-energy—isn't something you have to create. It's already present.

And when we notice it, even briefly, our system begins to feel a little more supported.

A Practice for Holding Light and Shadow

If it feels right, I'd like to invite you into a short practice. You're welcome to do this seated, lying down, or even while walking. Eyes open or closed, your choice—whatever lets your body feel most held and present as you read along.

And if at any point this doesn't feel supportive, you can pause, stop, or simply read along.

Notice the support beneath you. It could be the ground, a chair, the floor. See if you can sense how your body is being held without needing to do anything.
Gently orient to the space around you. Notice a few shapes, colors, or sounds—just enough to let your system know where you are.
Notice where light is sensed in your body today. Not what it means. Just sensation. Maybe light feels like warmth, openness, or a subtle sense of possibility. Find what's true for you.
When you're ready, notice where shadow is sensed. Perhaps heaviness, tightness, fatigue, or something quieter. Again, no story needed.
Notice that you are aware of both. The sensations of light and the sensations of shadow. And notice the awareness itself—the space that can hold both without choosing sides, without needing to resolve anything.

This spacious awareness, this Self-energy, is the ground that holds experience—just like the earth holds both sun and shade.

Stay here for a moment. Even a small glimpse is enough.

Moving Forward

As you come back to your day, you might gently ask yourself:

What do I notice now?
Is there even 1% more space within me? More softness? Permission?

And if not, that's okay too. This work isn't about forcing a particular state. It's about relationship.

This week, you might simply remember:

Both light and shadow are allowed.

You don't have to exile any part to move forward. And you don't have to rush the dark to earn the light.

Listen to the Full Episode

This post is adapted from IFS Enlightenment Snacks, Episode 1: Embracing the Shadows and The Light Within a short, nourishing podcast exploring Internal Family Systems, somatic awareness, and effortless mindfulness.

🎧 Listen now:
Apple Podcasts | Spotify | YouTube

Want a gentle reset practice? Download Unwind & Unblend—three short, free somatic practices to help you befriend your parts. Get it here.

Embracing the Shadows and the Light: Holding All Your Parts with Compassion